Note#7 -007

This note has no official subtitle, because, come on, it just a note. A note like any other. Insignificant. Funny. Local. It makes a statement within title itself- a rather fashionable one if you ask me (hint, don’t ask me).

Note #7 is simply Note #7. A note fitting for Mr. Bond (agent 007) himself. Cheers.

It is a note filled with mystery and suspense, build-up and quirkiness – except it isn’t.

CONTEXT:

On the contrary, mi notas and notos, today’s note may very well be different than any other note we’ve ever done before . It is not placed in a Sonoma County attraction. But, is it still in a weird place you may ask? Yes. But, it has no central topic or theme. Therefore, reading this context section may serve as utterly useless.Or doesn’t it? Perhaps I would’ve been better off by simply stating the following:

I put this note on my fridge.

In reality, this is precisely what I did. However, this note is still unique!

Today’s note is finally in line with the 21st century.

Today’s note marks a turning point in the NotesNoma blog and the note-making community.

Today’s note features state of the art magnets that stick to any metal surface  or face like the Terminator’s.

Simply put, today’s note is written on a digital pad that can be written on and erased with the ease of a singular button – over and over again.

Alas, a la nota (to the note).

HERE”S THE NOTE:

ATTENTION!

Now that I have it … carry on. ”

 

OBSERVATIONS:

Not noticing me on my computer in the living room, my father woke up in the middle of the night to grab a cup of milk. As he put his hand on the fridge door handle, he blinks several times to focus his eyes on the note. He slowly opens one door handle and grabs the milk carton. He looks to his left, and see’s me. I’m smiling 🙂 He then gives a quick three-second assessment of the situation, and quickly decides to put the milk back, slams the fridge, grunts, and goes back to sleep. . . He never came back for his milk.

My mom was one of the first people to wake up this morning. While walking drowsily, she grabs a bowl, opens the pantry where we keep our generic cereal boxes, walks slowly to the fridge and stops. She squints at the 72 point font in front of her that reads “ATTENTION…” Within a few seconds, she patiently yet forcefully leans all her body weight to quickly click the button on the tablet and erases all my work. She then proceeds with her routine mom script by asking, “Are you hungry?

Further dialogue with mi madre:

“What if the note said, the milk was expired?” I asked.

“What note,” she responded.

“The note you just erased!” .

“Oh. What did it say?”

“That’s my point.”

“Oh whoops… ”

(Looks a the note, then stares at me)

So you want to eat or not?”

“Yes.”

NEXT WEEK:

Drop comments below on note ideas you want me to do next, or I’ll shut down this blog forever. Thanks!

 

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Note#6~Roasting Friends

We’re back to continuing our series of funny notes in weird places.

How deep are your friendships? What signs can you look out for? Chances are you’ve reached a deeper level in your friendship if you do any of the following:

  • you and your friends “roast” each other
  • give each other a hard time
  • exaggerate each others flaws
  • team up to make fun of another friend behind their back (but eventually to their face),
  • you’ve created a new way of speaking to each other filled with inside jokes that only you all can understand
  • sarcasm (a lot of it, mostly obnoxious).

Or maybe your always the victim.

A Note About the Note:

Today’s post is a bit different than usual. Rather than focus on just one note, i’ll be focusing on several short notes!

Also, the subjects of these notes below are good friends of mine who have mocked me and have given me hard time for a while. Please don’t give them any sympathy and just enjoy the risks I’ve had to take to entertain you. Let’s just say once  a roast is kindled, it will get “lit” as they say.

I can already sense the amount of preparation they are all doing to destroy every ounce of respect and admiration you my blog readers have for me.

CONTEXT:

Normally, I’m usually the one who gets “roasted” by my group of friends at least three times per hangout. I’ll get roasted for everything i say and do. I even get a hard time  for simply saying “thank you” to my friends, who in turn sarcastically respond with a “yeah you better say thank you.”  At least, I hope their being sarcastic. I’m being sarcastic.

(Steps away from computer to look up the definition of sarcasm. Pats myself on the back). 

Anyway, today is the day the tables  have returned. 

Today, I’ve dedicated two personalized sticky notes to each one of my closest (or close enough) friends with an individual message roasting them. Some of these inside jokes may or may not fly across your head, but i hope they brighten your day nonetheless.

HERE ARE THE NOTES:

  • Target 1: Drizzy
    • Background:
      • Music major aka “basketweaver” as he likes to call all other non-STEM majors (except himself).
      • old soul
      • blunt personality
      • heavily sarcastic
      • always asks how my mom is doing for no reason.
      • Loves making things awkward
    • Note:
      • Posted on my friend’s Honda Accord on the driver-side door handle.
      • “Beethoven sucks….Tell your mom, I said hi.”
  • Target 2: Valentino
    • Background:
      • Clever in the art of slipping in insults in regular conversation without breaking character.
      • Human calculator
      • unemployed
      • lives with parents
      • favorite word is “noob” (short for newbie)
      • Established a set of dialogue conventions and terms filled with insider jokes, and is embarrassing if overhead in public.
    • Note was posted inside his MacBook
      • “Whats up Shark Tank, your still unemployed? This computer is pretty greasy, don’t you know your keyboards can get a sickness called “sticky keys.” Noob. Lay off the egg rolls a bit, here’s a gift card to juice shack chubby.” There was $0.01 on the gift card.

That’s it.

 

Note#5 – A Real Stream of Consciousness

Context:

Remember, when you were younger, how you had Silent Sustained Reading time? I sat at my desk this evening reminiscing on this for some reason as I was thinking about what my next blog post should be. At various points in my academic career as early as elementary school, I can recall being asked to dedicate a few minutes to write with a steady stream of consciousness. Simply write. We would eventually share our streams of consciousness to form what i thought was a deceptively deep river of what i would classify as “filtered self-conscious free writes.” I usually find that no one follows the rules of our assignment to its fullest, as I see a strike-through and other edits before sharing time.

It’s in our nature to be self-conscious of be concerned about what others may think about us, however,  I find it really hard to believe that everyone thinks about Edgar Allan Poe and the nirvana of nature during a 7:00 a.m. class. Especially, without any grammar mistakes. Most people think about coffee and whether or not it was a good idea to even come to class that day to be quite honest.

By definition, a stream of consciousness is a literary style in which a character’s thoughts, feelings, and reactions are depicted in a continuous flow uninterrupted by objective description or conventional dialogue.

That being said below is a real stream of consciousness piece I just wrote and posted for a short time in my room. This stream of consciousness is unfiltered, original, raw, fresh – the way it should always be. Keep in mind it is flowing freely from the perspective of a highly-educated 20 something-year-old millennial during a time of being sleep deprived for the past few days due to work, responsibilities, and finals week Enjoy.

Here’s the Note:

Note: Read the context.

Dear me,

Oh dear me. This cannot be, all of what life must be.

The birds sing, but my voice is cracking.

That was random. I was on a roll there, but what’s the point of being poetic besides creating beauty. Like, what is the real significance? Poetry can’t put money in my pockets. It can’t feed me. It can’t open any doors worth walking through? So why do it? Why do we care? Why should we care? Because it makes us feel good?

Slow clap to Edgar Allan Poe. Good job bro, you’re creative. Why are we spending an hour and half each week still talking about poets who were celebrities in the 17th and 18th century, when they’re broke in the current century? Sure, were English majors and we enjoy writing. Sure, I can admit I got respect for their talent and can admire it. But, i’m not here to be entertained. I paid $456 for this course out of my own pocket as a sacrificial investment for my future. For my family’s future. Not for a 36-week show.

Oh a semester is not 36 weeks? Slow clap for you for pointing out something so insignificant. I don’t know why i sound so irritated, but I know i’m not the only one. Not the only one expecting to better themselves through education – desperately. The education system swallowed me and spat me out. It set me up. At least, that’s how I feel at this moment. For now.

Does education only work for those who major in STEM (Science Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics)? Or is there room for me to explore? If so, how long should i explore and reap no results? How many more A’s, high G.P.As, degrees, certificates, essays, Dean’s lists, honor rolls, and money to finally be successful? Please don’t put the blame on me (the student) – that would be the easy way out. I know my part in this. I’m just looking for help. I’m not afraid of the work – I’ve done it and continue to do it successfully. I’ve done everything they said. I’ve dedicated all of my time, energy, and money to it. The real question is what happens afterwards?

What happens when the courses are over? What happens when I cross that stage for the third time and receive another meaningless piece of paper? Do teacher office hours end after the semester does? What if career-centers just waste your time? Where do I learn soft-skills? How can i prove to my employers and coworkers that I’m just a hard worker who can deliver real results and can make a real impact, rather than be labeled as an awkward butterfly who doesn’t “fit in”?

I smile everyday, and am loyal to my craft. I educate myself, work, and repeat. “Insanity.”as Einstein said, is “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.” But, i haven’t been taught anything else. I don’t know how to talk to people and magically have the, give me a job (like other unqualified people do). I just want to help my family and want to do a good job. Why am I not good enough? I’ve proven I am. If my education and skills are valuable, why don’t I see it? Is it safe to say that perhaps some of us don’t know the next steps? Is it safe to assume that perhaps it’s not a question of willingness, but a lack of knowledge on the source and tactics of upward development? Is it safe to say that some of us don’t have parents or mentors to guide us – who have any idea of what were going through as first-generation college students? Some of us are poor. Some us have had different experiences and treatments in the work world than others that simply cannot be completely understood with just words. Most of us would rather finish something one time, rather than get cross-sold to start all over again.

Maybe college can’t help me. Maybe work-experiences are just tests that cannot be prepared for. Maybe I should just keep failing, despite “succeeding”, and learn the hard way. Or maybe I should just continue the family tradition of giving up on my dreams, and pick up a labor-intensive job that provides a house for my children so that they may hopefully get it right rather than get influenced by the folly that surrounds the neighborhood we end up in. The cycle continues?

If i have nothing at all, at least i’ll have a voice right? What’s a voice worth? Brief fame? Remembrance in history? Meaningless compliments? Sympathy? Will this blog post be studied by a private school instructor? Tell me how that helps me (the customer, the student, the creator, the writer, the philosopher). Shall I get my Ph.d and be homeless? 

All this to say, I don’t blame education. I don’t blame anything or anyone.

The only one responsible for our success are ourselves.

I’m just a kid who skipped a grade, worked hard, developed skills, and had nothing to show for it. I’m still learning, but it’s a different type of education – one that I’m obviously not used to called life.

When i overcome it, I will be grateful for all of the above – at least that’s what people say. I’ll believe it, when I experience it.

This is pretty sad. Melancholy a popular theme of Edgar Allan Poe. I don’t know why i’m referring to Edgar Allan Poe so much. I always found that guy overrated for some reason. I haven’t taken an English class in five years. I received a lot of awards in English and even poetry slams, but you probably couldn’t tell with this blog post.

I’m just going to wrap this up. I can see why most people edit these free writes. This stream of consciousness stuff gets real – it’s kind of funny.

Remember, a wise man once said, “If we didn’t laugh, we’d be crying.”

-END-

Note: Don’t attempt to try to understand the why, there’s simply not enough context. It’s a stream of consciousness from someone who lives in the context and understands. Instead I’d rather suggest you view the above piece as a literary work. 

How to Get FREE Fries at McDonalds in California

What’s up NotesNoma fans! Happy Cyber Monday!

Watch this video we made to see how to get free fries at McDonald’s.

Here’s the Deal: 

Every time the Warriors win a home game, McDonald’s almost always offer free fries in its California stores. Last year, these were regular medium-sized fries. This year, they offer free garlic medium-sized fries. They want to make everyone feel like their a “baller.” Can you say “swish?”

What You Need to Do:

  1. The very first thing you must do is download the free McDonald’s mobile application (available on Android and iOS platforms).
  2. Then, you will need to sign-up for a free account and choose your local McDonald’s store.
  3. Once logged in, you will have access to the “Deals” section where you will find the free garlic fries offer following a Warriors home game win.
  4. After selecting the deal, a QR code should appear on your phone. Simply take this to check-out counter and show it to your cashier in which they will have it scanned.
  5. Wait patiently. Reflect on happy thoughts such as stumbling across this blog post and saving money.
  6. Finally, redeem your free fries (once it is ready).

Please note: The chances of your friends asking you for some fries will go up exponentially when travelling or hanging out together. It is highly advisable that you do not throw away your fries, but to first check-in with anyone nearby (particularly those in need).

The McDonald’s app offers more than just free fries, of course. They offer weekly deals, buy one get one free offers, and much more. I’ve utilized this many times and can attest to this wallet-friendly experience.

This post is in not sponsored by McDonald’s. It is simply effort to help you, from one broke college student to another. I do hope to soon go there again and offer my free fries to the homeless and share some light this holiday season. I challenge you to be a light that gives warmth to someone’s cold world this holiday season!

Happy Cyber Monday!

 

Note#4~The Car Note

Have you ever came back to your car, only to find a note placed on the dashboard? The instant fear of a parking citation, an angry letter about how you suck at parking, or even worse a hit-and-run of your parked vehicle are all thoughts most people think of when seeing an unexpected note on their car.

Let’s have some fun.

CONTEXT:

Tonight’s note was placed on a gray Toyota Highlander parked outside of a popular office store located on an avenue in which the city is named after. Can you guess which popular office store parking lot i’m referring to in “‘Noma”? Comment below!

Note to self: never roam around this parking lot eve again, even if trying to burn some calories after consuming a deliciously fattening chicken-bake from Costco. You may somehow find yourself in what looks to be the set of Fast & Furious 9 and end-up losing the pink-slip to your car or you may find yourself lured by Black Friday deals inside Marshall’s. You should really be able to guess which office store parking lot i’m talking about now.

HERE’S THE NOTE:

“Sorry for the Damage.

I’m broke.”

WHAT HAPPENED?:

A guy came up to his car with two items from the office store, placed the items on the passenger seat, and started his car. He then noticed the note. He got out of the car with it still running and furiously pulled out the note from the windshield wiper. He read the note. Looking both to his left and his right, without even assessing his car, he quickly surveyed the parking lot looking for the owner of this note.

To be clear, there was absolutely nothing wrong with his car!

If after reading this note, you completely disregard the very subject of which the note is referring to and simply go on a hunt for the messenger. Then, you sir, are something else.

So, what ended up happening?

Don’t know. I left.

[VIDEO] Funny Car Reviews: Toyota Yaris

Check out our first episode of “Funny Car Reviews,” sponsored by NotesNoma here 

funny-car-review

What we like about the Yaris:

  • Being able to park in small spaces
  • Being the least likely nominated to drive or pickup friends and family  🙂
  • Gas-saver
  • Gas-saver
  • Gas-saver
  • Great miles per gallon
  • reliable
  • cheap tires
  • cheap oil changes
  • quick car wash
  • makes other car-owners question the amount they spend on their car, leading them to feel as if they need to give you insults

What we don’t like about Yaris:

  • Safety
  • Cabin space and noise
  • interior
  • exterior
  • recalled airbags and unstable locked seats at high speeds
  • Radio
  • only two doors for our hatchback which requires a lot of manual labor to fold up the seat and let additional passengers in the back.
  • the haters.
  • not ideal for a serious date
  • not ideal for long-distance traveling (you will feel as if the car is being lifted by the wind when you travel highway speeds and suddenly hit a sudden dip in the road).
  • weak engine with 45 slices of horse meat for power.

Ratings:

  • Reliability: 10/10 (nearly 100,000 miles and still running strong with no issues).
  • MPG: 1000/10 
  • Technology: -4/5
  • Safety: On a scale between being scared of a spider and riding a roller coaster with no seatbelt, the Yaris falls more towards the latter. You will have the same amount of trust you have that your sibling will catch you if you fall backwards blindfolded.
  • Literally everything else: Not good.

NotesNoma Reccomendation:

If your broke and want to save money, if the gas-filling experience is a sacred and enjoyable time of reflection and rejoicing, than buy this used car.

Happy travels!

~NotesNoma Editor (in collaboration with the FresherThanUrkel youtube channel).

NOTE#3~WATER BOTTLE GUILT

I don’t know what it is with me and water (see my first note about water fountains), but here’s the second portion of the first note’s theme – water.

CONTEXT:

I placed the following note on an unopened Pellegrino sparkling water bottle, and placed it on my sister’s desk when she walked way to get a bite to eat. She’s very health-conscious. If there’s one thing about Sonoma County is that it’s an expensive area to live in, which means we attract a lot of health fanatics and whole-foods shoppers. You know the types to spend $20 on a salad during a work-break while I eat at taco bell and get a meal deal for $2.75 during happy hour with the rest of the world.

What on earth is kale by the way? Has this always existed or is it man-made?

Anyway, you may have heard that it is important to drink 7-8 cups of water a day. Or something like along those lines. You may have even shopped at Costco and saw ridiculous upgrades to your standard Crystal Geyser water bottle. Stuff like Smart Water (which is simply double the size and triple the price of standard water).  There is even sparkling or carbonated water. It’s WATER people! There’s rarely any difference between them. If you’ve read the ingredients in water bottles in third-world countries, you see they add many chemicals to “sterilize” and provide “nutrition” to their water. In reality, I feel this does more harm than good. All this water talk is making me thirsty, and i’m normally good at going long-distances without it. Trust me I know, it’s in my African genes.

Essentially, I was just trying to guilt trip people for drinking water with this note. However, more information and facts about water is available at atallaboutwater.org/water-facts.html and treehugger.com.

Stay thirsty my friends.

HERE”S WHAT THE NOTE SAYS:

“So you bought this expensive sparkling carbonated water. You must feel pretty damn good about yourself. You health-conscious fanatic you.

Well, did you know:

  • Drinking too much water too quickly can lead to water intoxication
  • Much more fresh water is stored under the ground in aquifers than on the earth’s surface.
  • Collectively, South African women and children walk a daily distance equivalent to 16 trips to the moon and back to fetch water.
  • 32. It takes 2,641 gallons of water to make a pair of jeans.
  • The United States uses nearly 80 percent of its water for irrigation and thermoelectric power.
  • Some 1.8 billion people worldwide drink water that is contaminated with feces.

Not to mention, there are so many other things that look just like water.

Think about it.

If i were you, i’d go grab an orange juice with some high-fructose corn syrup or something.

By the way the caps open”

 

For the record, there was absolutely nothing wrong with the water bottle, my sister just threw it away and drank two more. Then, she did a handstand.

Fail.

Note#2~Indoor Soccer

Context:

This was placed in an indoor soccer facility for nearly two hours. We were playing soccer inside a basketball court and as people got exhausted or simply gave up on the person they were defending, they would lean in to briefly look at this funny note.

As always comment if you can guess where this location

Here’s the Note:

“HEY STOP RUNNING!

Thanks..

Did you know?

In the 1938 World Cup semifinal, Italian Guiseppe Meazza’s shorts fell down as he was taking a penalty shot.

He held his shorts up and calmly kicked the ball towards Brazil’s goalkeeper Valter Zenga.

Did he score?

I guess there’s only one way to find out?”

NEW ~ Follow us on our new Facebook and Twitter!

NOTE#1 ~ WATER FOUNTAIN

First Note Posted! 

Context:

The note was posted during an evening class, and hangs right above the main water fountain on three-floor building. Most students who will saw the sign are most likely taking a three-hour class with a short 5-10 minute break or two.

One lady in a white shirt stopped by and instantly saw the sign. You could tell she just wanted to drink some water, but looked as if she was debating with herself whether or not to read the sign. Eventually she did. She looked perplexed as if she never seen a flyer or sign before. I’m sure she was thinking, “Why would anyone…you know whatever. It’s late, lets just see what this is about?” She leaned in with her mouth half-open – almost grinning, but also giving the sign the type of look a wife gives her husband when he asks her “What’s wrong?”

Anyway, she took too long to read, so i left.

Duration:

The note was up about an hour between 8 – 9 p.m. on Monday, evening

If you recognize where this is posted in ‘Noma, then stay posted, and keep those eyes peeled. Because there will be another note and another chance for you to respond and have your comment featured on NotesNoma!

At Last, the Note!

Long day huh? (sigh).

Oh, by all means, have a drink.

You know evening classes will do that to you. Gotta ration that brain power and stay nourished.

Here’s an energy-saving tip: pretty sure the harder you press on both buttons of the fountain, the stronger the pressure will be. You’re welcome.

Go get’em tiger.

First blog post! – FREE NEW YEARS ITEM TO FIRST 100 SUBSCRIBERS

Dear NomaNotes fans,

Before we get into the funny notes. I wanted to congratulate and welcome you not only to my blog, but to my very first blog post!

This is quite historic.If your reading this, please subscribe to the blogs RSS feed and mention you have subscribed in the comments section to qualify to receive a free item on New Years 2017. Believe that i will remember each and every one of you for being loyal NomaNotes fans since the beginning of it all and will work hard to produce great content and look for ways of rewarding you for your support. Because, lets be honest, this blog is going places.

Here it is is, the pledge: 

As a matter of fact, to prove to you how special and loyal i think you all are, I want to make a pledge. The first 100 NomaNotes fans who subscribe to NomaNotes RSS feed and comment below (from now until the end of 2016) will automatically be entered in my “NomaNotes First 100 Club.” What does that mean? You will find out with a free gift to start your new year at precisely 12:00 a.m. on January 1st, 2017!

What do I get? 

Lets just say i’ll be quite generous, a little less generous than Oprah, but still generous. In addition, I’m dedicated to providing my NomaNotes First 100 Club members with special exclusive content, and provide them with free item(s) to help them get their New Year started in the right direction.

Thank you for your loyalty and for being apart of the experience in sharing a chuckle with me.

ABOUT THIS BLOG:

 What you can expect in future posts?

Funny notes, memes, responses to funny notes, photos of Sonoma County scenery, contests, humorous commentaries, articles and funny stories of real-life encounters or experiences I’ve had.  However, the majority of our posts will simply be funny notes in their respective areas which i call “NomaNotes.”

Why did i start this blog?

Initially, creating this blog was part of an assignment for my social media class. However, I’ve decided to stay committed.

The main purpose of this blog is to make people smile, laugh, and distract them from whatever stress they are going through in life with a funny note. Also to peak your curiosity of finding and snapping these notes (for the limited time they are posted) throughout Sonoma County. You’ll notice there a few hots spots that tend to be popular sites for these notes. I hope to get the people of ‘Noma County to feel a sense of community when they see these notes stick on to be part of its identity and pride.

Feel free to submit any ideas for funny yet appropriate and uplifting notes, and where you’d suggest I temporarily post them. NotesNoma submissions can be made using the contact form.

Our first note will be posted next Tuesday, October 10th! Mark your calendars, or just subscribe to the RSS and never miss a post.